meet the new blog, same as the old blog

I've told you that I am what I hate. I've shared my anger and rage, and I've done the foxtrot with my shadow. But as my dearest friend so insightfully pointed out, all of this has been the shit of yesterday, and now it's time to move on. The road I'm currently on is bumpy with frequent forks and roundabouts, so buckle up.

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Jesus was said to have chased seven demons out of Mary Magdalene. Could it be that he merely opened her eyes to the divinity within us all, thus freeing her of the Seven Deadly Sins?

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My paternal grandmother is 92, and her memory is failing rapidly. Recently she said, "I need a new head. They don't sell those, you know."

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To make trips to the airport more enjoyable:
1. All airports should be required to play Brian Eno's Music for Airports at least three times a day.
2. All boarding announcements should be delivered through a talk-box a la Peter Frampton on Do You Feel Like We Do.
3. For five dollars, one should receive a lap dance from a professional stripper with a metal detector.

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Weirdsville--once your ears recover, they will thank you

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Thank you, and good night. Pleasant dreams.

enemadda da vida

Argh, another case of Writer's Block, this time due to a combination of frustration and exhaustion. My thoughts cling to my brain stem like a constricting ivy. I have so much mental pollution that I need to expel but cannot. Instead, I find myself trapped in a Harlan Ellison story as Mad-Libbed by Beavis and Butthead: I Have No Ass, and I Must Crap.

This too shall pass.