say hello to my little friend

embrace the random lvii

Nietzsche Family Circus -- grimly hilarious.

truth in advertising?

truth in advertising?

It's a little hard to see, but the bumper reads, "WARNING: UNSOCIALIZED HOMESCHOOLERS"

lost in translation

Years ago, I was a student-teacher at a local high school. My mentor-teacher related the following story to me: A girl walked into the classroom wearing a very stylish new dress. The teacher remarked, "Ooh, tres chic!" The girl instantly frowned, sat at her desk, and began to pout. The teacher was puzzled by this reaction and asked the girl what was wrong. She replied, "You said that I looked trashy!"

embrace the random liii

The Contemporary Classical Composer's Bullshit Generator

absurd assignments

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to invent a job.
My new job is Academic-Journal Publicist:

New! From the think tank that brought you the smash-hit The Transgressive Paradox of Institutionalized Dichotomies in Parallel Hegemonies comes this summer's blockbuster thesis!

In a dystopian metasphere of fear and lust, where didacticism acted in opposition to onanism, one man was Cthonian enough to posit an alternative paradigm.

But was his Byronic stance an ironic metacriticism of the issue at hand, or was it a Freudian compensation for Oedipal impulses long suppressed? You decide!

Coming to Aisle 11 of your local university library-plex, written in Jargon-O-Rama, it's Chuck Berry's My Ding-a-Ling: Novelty Song or Cry for Help.

Four out of five semioticians agree -- tautological reasoning has never been this thrilling!

this just in...

Craig Ferguson is the most hilarious man on television. End of discussion.

this guy made my day

He's referring to this scene from one of my favorites shows, The Big Bang Theory. The "Support Zombies" sticker is pretty funny too.

best youtube video ever

Heavy Metal Penguin

truth in advertising

the anti-giving tree

misheard lyrics

So goodbye, sweet appetite
No Cenobite could satisfy

video of the day

Nine Inch Nails truly have a Spinal Tap moment.

on the lighter side

Best Help Wanted ad ever?

i can't make this stuff up

Playmobil Security Checkpoint

Be sure to read the customer reviews. Hilarious.

need a laugh? me too

Joy Division has never been funnier.

a musing

I would like to rip my own spine out and beat people with it. But that would be a spineless thing to do, so I won't.

overheard...

...while at a record store:

"I've told you the story about how ketchup drove me over the edge."

How does one reply to that?

dork night

Be very grateful that the new Batman movie was not produced and directed by my subconscious. In last night's dream, Christian Bale was wearing Adam West's old costume, and Alfred was played by Arthur English.